01/18/2007 THE TIME IS AT HAND…

It’s a little past midnight and we are getting ready for bed. The bags are pretty much packed and the house is pretty much ready. My daughter and her boyfriend came to get the dog tonight to keep her for the weekend. And I’ve set the alarm for 4:30 am so that I can get up and drive Al to the hospital in Arlington for spinal surgery. They want us there by 5:45 am even though they won’t take him into surgery until 7:15 am. I guess we are as ready as we can be.

We had a burst of energy earlier in the evening, moving the big couch into the living room, vacuuming all of the carpets and sitting down to a quiet dinner. Then we pulled out all of our DVDs and re-arranged them into more logical groupings. Maybe it was nervous energy. Maybe it was something else.

During the week there’s been this unspoken feeling and sense of things between us. It wasn’t fear or uneasiness. For the most part, we’ve been comfortable with the pending procedure and yesterday the doctor even pulled out a model and showed Al exactly what they were going to be doing with his spine. That helped even more. No, the feeling between us has not been a bad thing at all.

We both certainly understand that with any kind of surgery, no matter how minor or how complicated, there is always the chance that something could go wrong. We have not been carrying around any kind of fear associated with that subtle knowledge. The feeling that has been unspoken, but deeply felt, is more akin to sensing the moments of being together. It has been us being more keenly aware of the preciousness of those moments. Each glance, each meal shared, each good night kiss – has lately been that much more special and wrapped in the aura of a gift. And it has so palpable lately. So sweet.

While we still “check in” with each other on a regular basis and ask how the other is doing, no matter what the answer has been, behind that answer is a knowing look that says “I know… and I love you more each day”.

So as I turn out the light tonight, pull him closer to me, snuggle up and whisper “good night” and “I love you” – the words we exchange will carry with them that extra bit of care, love and heart-felt devotion that assures the other that we recognize these moments, as much as any other, are more precious than gold!

May we all live in the fullness of each moment of our lives!

WOOF ya later!
~bbw