Wednesday, December 16, 2009

12/16/2009 - GROW UP, ALREADY...

I could have just left it alone. And for the most part, I did. I let the media run their circus and I just stayed out of it. Reserving most of my thoughts and opinions and holding them to myself. If you know me at all – you know that’s not simple task! But in this case it was especially important because it was a crucial topic to me personally, and because the media (as usual) rushed to the presses with every little bit of factual and/or fictional detail they could scrounge.

Something bad happened to Rihanna and Christopher “Chris” Maurice (really?) Brown, and from the very earliest reports, it looked a LOT like a domestic abuse case in which Chris brutally and viciously attacked the professed love of his life, injuring her physically and traumatizing her emotionally before leaving her on the side of the road and rushing off to hide.

Today we have a much fuller picture of the events and we know that Chris did indeed do all of the things I listed, and more. Much more. He went so far as to threaten her very life, and who knows, given any slight change in circumstance, like say – she didn’t have a cell phone… he may have carried out that threat. But let’s not suppose anything more than we know. He beat her, bit her and left her injured and dazed on the side of a dark road at night, bleeding and helpless and then he ran to hide.

Then Rihanna files a police report in which she is required to give as much detail as possible, no matter how excruciating it is for her to have to remember or relive, in order for the authorities to get an accurate account of the events both during the attack, but also leading up to and immediately after the attack.

What does Chris do – he waits a few days and then comes forward to answer questions and “just to clear things up” and clear his name, since obviously the media has things wrong and have blown things way out of proportion. At some point, Chris also gives a generic apology online to his fans and the public.

Moving forward, Chris displays some moderate amount of what I’ll call “generic” remorse, still not coming clean and manning up to the fact that he beat the crap out of his girlfriend, and mentions that he is seeking the counsel of his pastor and family and friends. Awww – how nice, how almost sweet, how… what’s the word I’m searching for… whitebread!

In court he enters a plea of guilty (ya think?!) for a felony assault and gets a paltry 5 year probationary sentence. So guess what... Chris Brown is still out on the streets and just released a new album. Which brings me to the entire reason for this blog and why I can no longer hold my tongue.

Chris is not happy with his album sales, and he feels that he is being black-balled by the industry. He has himself reported on Twitter that he’s going into stores to see if they are stocking his CD on their shelves – and when he doesn’t find them – he asks for the manager because he doesn’t think that’s fair. The one instance Chris cites on Twitter about a Walmart where the manager said they didn’t have any of his CD’s is almost funny because Chris goes OFF – and in fact the reason the Walmart didn’t have any was because they had already sold out. The store manager was not aware of this fact. Perhaps Chris should have talked to someone in electronics!

But to Chris’ point – there have been other reports where his Fans have gone into stores and been told by managers that not only are the new CDs not on the shelves, but that they will never be stocked and in fact the stores won’t be carrying any more Chris Brown music. Now the fans and Chris are all in a tizzy and screaming about unfairness and blackballing and WHAAA WHAAA WHAAA!

And so, for you Mr. Christopher Maurice Brown, I have these four words – GROW THE FUCK UP!

In addition, the last time I checked this was still the United States of America. And being such, you have the right to cry and whine all you want. But guess what, stores have the right to stock the products they want to sell. Or, in this case, the right to NOT stock something they don’t want to sell. Just like it is my personal right to buy or NOT buy your CD. Does this make them bad stores, bad managers or bad people? I don’t think so. Some people have a strong sense of indignation for domestic abuse and those that perpetrate it. They may feel especially incensed when the person who causes such violence really never comes out and accepts the responsibility for what they did and takes their punishment like a real man. They may just not have a lot of warm fuzzies for someone like you Mr. Brown. You should count yourself very VERY lucky that you did not end up in prison. I doubt seriously if you would last a day in the joint with even half the poise and dignity that your ex-girlfriend and abuse survivor has done after getting away from you! Or – perhaps these shop managers and business owners feel this is their “own little way” of speaking out against domestic abuse, sort of like a personal protest or boycott. Guess what, if enough people feel that way, you may find yourself some day, working at Walmart and asking “paper or plastic?”.

So think about it. Dood - you got lucky. You and Rihanna both got lucky! You both have a chance to start over and do things right. It appears she is making the most of her 2nd chance. Yet, it appears as though you haven’t learned a thing! Remember, the world doesn’t owe you anything. You are too old to blame your behavior on being a “kid” and too old to blame mommy and daddy! You are in the world now as a man – so please, start acting like one. No – scratch that. You have been “acting” - start BEING a man! In the long run you will be a more fulfilled person, a more prolific and satisfied/satisfying artist and your future girlfriends/fiancĂ©e/wife will be much much safer.

With love and respect, I wish you peace and good luck.

To the rest of us – may we learn from our own past mistakes, as well as the mistakes of others, for we are never so different from our brothers.

WOOF ya later!
~ bbw