anchoran•chor [ángker]
noun (plural an•chors)
Definition:
1. device to hold ship in place: a heavy, traditionally double-hooked, device for keeping a ship or floating object in place
2. device keeping object in place: any device that keeps an object in place
Driving to work this morning I was thinking about anchors, not necessarily in the traditional sense of big iron hooks that drag and catch at the bottom of the murky seas, but more in the figurative or symbolic sense. I was thinking about the things in my life, both concrete, and imagined, that seem somehow to hold me in place and keep me from moving forward with my life’s dreams, goals and passions. You see, my soul has been stirring again lately, as it often does when I’m either doing something I shouldn’t or not doing something I should. If I’m really honest with myself, and from time to time I try to be, I might even admit that my soul has been stirring for a long time… a very long time.
But as some of you may know… not all stirrings are equal!
As I drove this morning, I marveled at my good mood. I was smiling for no reason other than the day was good and I had a sense of being alive. More than this, I had a sense of purpose about my life this day, which is something that has been missing for way too long. Too many days, weeks and months have gone by where I have dragged myself from bed, showered, shaved, dressed, gone through the motions at a job I detest, come home and then dreaded the repetition I knew waited for me the next day. WTF?! I deserve better than that out of life. The people I love deserve better than that out of ME!
At some point this weekend a seed of an idea drifted into my mind. It was the idea that all the excuses I keep making for not doing the things I want to do right now are just that – excuses! And that they are false. So what if I’m in the middle of a divorce? Does that mean my life needs to be put on hold? No. So what if I’ve been at my job for 9+ years and things “might” be starting to get better – does that mean I shouldn’t just jump out there and look for a “Dream Job”? No.
This led to my thoughts this morning about anchors – or those things that I keep allowing to drag me down, hold me back and keep my life from being the life I want to be living. My anchors include people, voices from the past, thoughts, ideas, doubts, fears, insecurities, worries and probably a host of other things! But basically any of those things that have a negative impact on my health, wellness and fulfillment in life.
The GOOD NEWS is… I’ve made a decision to do something about it! I’m going to start trying to identify my anchors, and as quickly, honestly and deliberately as possible, extract them from my life. I want to throw away the excuses for not living the life I want to live and not pursuing happiness. If I fail to achieve some of my goals – I can handle that – but I don’t want to miss out because I was too afraid to try, or had my head so deeply buried in self-doubts, fears and excuses to even see that I COULD have tried!
I’ve done a few things right in my life. My kids – VERY RIGHT! Therefore, by default, my wife – very right for the time, but that time is over. My partner now – VERY RIGHT! My love for other people – it’s right, but I don’t think I’m doing everything I SHOULD be doing in that area. So I’ll keep looking for the right way to apply myself. The rest of my current life is wide open for change. My job, this city, this country – everything is open for discussion and change. My dreams and passions include creativity, photography and travel. Is there a job for me somewhere that will fit those passions and dreams? I don’t know – but I won’t let my job stop me from pursuing LIFE!
Sometimes I wonder if I’m on the right track with things, and every now and then I get a small cosmic tap on the shoulder that tells me everything will be ok. Today was no exception.
I arrived at the office this morning to find an email from a friend, who is also sort of an arch-nemesis when it comes to political views, and we rib each other quite a bit about such issues. But today he sent me these words accompanied by a short article which I will include as well:
“The Fear of Succeeding is the worst fear of all - because we all have it within ourselves to be really great.”
Monday, February 18, 2008
Decide and do
The route to success in any area of life can be summed up in a simple, easy-to-remember formula. Decide what you wish to do, and then do it.
That may seem entirely obvious, and indeed it is. Yet even though the path to success is so clear and simple, many people have great difficulty following it.
The decision of what to do can be greatly hindered by doubts, fears, insecurities and worries, as well as by confusion over priorities. To get past all that, remember that every doubt is a creation of your own mind, and deep within you is an authentic purpose that can transcend any challenge.
When it comes to taking action, there can be all sorts of justifications and excuses for not doing so. To move forward anyway, it's important to keep in mind that every moment is an opportunity to create value for your life and your world.
When you choose to do nothing with this moment, the opportunity it contains is gone forever, never to return. Choose instead to invest yourself in effective action, and the potential value of this moment is transformed into real, actual, lasting value in your life.
Decide how you can best express the values and dreams that mean so much to you. Then take step after step to successfully bring your decisions to life.
-- Ralph Marston
So it seems that my idea about pulling up the anchors of one’s soul isn’t an entirely new idea, nor did I intend to imply that it was. I’m just excited today because it has found its way into my way of thinking and reinvigorated me today. I entered 2008 feeling that changes would indeed be coming this year, but I felt that most of those changes would come at me like the Texas weather – with little warning and nothing I could do about it but wait until it changed again. I don’t feel that way anymore. I feel I can have a more deliberate hand in my life and my future, if I only step up and decide to do so. Today I have made that decision.
I don’t pretend to believe that every day from here on out will be easy. I bet things are going to be a lot harder at times than they are today – especially when I make decisions of the heart over decisions of convenience as I may have done in the past. But if health, wellness and fulfillment are truly my goal, I will learn to deal with those times as well. Wish me luck! I wish you the same!
WOOF ya later!
~bbw
