01/02/2007 - STARTING FRESH...

Here we are again! Another new year, full of promise, potential and possibilities! We should all be brimming with energy and excitement just thinking about it. But sometimes that is not the case. Sometimes, we are coming down off of the high of the recent holiday excitement. Or we may be simply exhausted from it all. Sometimes we may be dreading another year of unfulfilling jobs, insurmountable bills and loving relationships that seem out of our grasp.

In some ways, I'm very lucky. Not that my job is all that sweet. It does pay well but I find it harder and harder to go to work every day. I will have to really consider what to do about that this year. I plan to get a better handle on my finances this year too. I made some pretty good progress in 2006, but there’s still some work to do, and some additional self-discipline to apply.

In the area of relationships, I'm very lucky indeed. Now, I know that luck isn’t all of it, because real relationships take work, and effort on everyone’s behalf. But I’m starting off 2007 with great friends, a wonderful family, and a partner who is as much in tune with me as anyone I’ve ever met.

This New Year’s Eve, I went to dinner with my wife and my boyfriend (how many people can say that?!) and we talked about our plans and expectations for the coming year. The kids made their own NYE plans for the first time in their lives, so the adults were pretty much on their own. It was kinda cool! New Year’s Day, we all got back together with the kids, cooked up some home-made Chinese pork dumplings and sat around watching movies.

The week after Christmas, I mailed a letter to my Dad, effectively “coming out” to him and letting him know where my life is today and giving him some high-level insight into my relationship status with my wife and with Al. I wanted to do it after Christmas so that he would not have that on his heart during that time, but I also wanted him to know before the new year began. He called me on December 30 but I didn’t take the call. I wasn’t ready to have a discussion just yet. He left me an encouraging voice-mail, letting me know he loved me and that I would always be his son. I have to admit – I did not expect that response. I didn’t know what to expect, and I felt it was safer to have no expectations at all.

On NYE, I called him back and we chatted briefly. His main concern was that I was not depressed during the holidays. I explained how I have had about 4 years to deal with it now, and that I was doing well, and he shouldn’t worry. He also did not want me to worry. He only mentioned twice how he does not approve of “that kind of lifestyle” but that he loved me. Then there was the awkward joke when he asked if this was a “Brokeback Mountain” kind of thing and all I could do was laugh and explain to him that no, we did not own any sheep! LOL

In retrospect, I'm not sure how the wine industry will measure their vintages from the past 12 months, but for me, 2006 was a good year. I traveled a bit, met and made some really great friends, and created some wonderful memories. So if I may correct myself… 2006 was a GREAT year!

Looking forward to 2007 is a bit daunting, as it always is for me trying to “see” into the future. But I will deal with the issues of my job, and will continue to prioritize finances, family and fun as we move forward into the year. I will continue to cherish the friends and loved ones who stand by me, reach out to me and support me in this journey called “life”. I will continue to be open to learning new things, seeing new perspectives, making new friends and experiencing life to the fullest. I really can’t say what 2007 has in store for me, but I know this… I’m ready for the adventure!

WOOF ya later!
~ bbw